Posts
IN A CORNER, PTSD AND YOU!
Written by Jim “Gymbeaux”
Brown May 18, 2022
DISCLAIMER: I am not a doctor, nor do I pretend to be a doctor. I am writing about what I have recently observed/heard, nothing more.
Have you ever been in a corner? It is exactly what it implies. You have entered a space, physical or mental and as you continue into the space the walls begin to form a “V” and you are at the base of the “V” and there appears to be no way out except for the way you came in. Wait, someone has shut the door behind you and that leaves only two alternatives or options for you. You either continue doing what you have been doing that got you into the corner or you do as some have chosen to do, take their own life. Suicide, the final way out of the corner. That is MY definition of PTSD or how I THINK that it describes it, at least to me.
I bring this up because I have recently listened to an interview and also an online class and they spoke of the same thing, people who choose suicide as a way out of their predicament, either physical or mental. Sadly, most seem to be mental issues. People imagine they are in a corner but in real life, there are usually alternative avenues and people more than willing to help like Dr. Rayna Gangi. It’s a very long link, I hope it works for you, it is a discussion you will want to hear. You may have to copy and paste the link to your browser, please do not let that stop you from listening in, you will learn a great deal, as did I.
During the second podcast I heard, which was a class on law conducted by David Straight, PTSD was briefly discussed. This is when I heard the connection that I had never heard before. Having served in the Coast Guard during the Vietnam War, I know the fear of being drafted that ran through the minds of boys/men/women my age in 1965-1974, shamefully, I admit that I experienced that fear. We all knew that the war was wrong. The American people knew the war was wrong! Several Kent State students were murdered protesting the Vietnam War. No one wanted to go. Many escaped to Canada instead of reporting for the draft. Some found alternative avenues like the Military Reserve, the National Guard or some declared they were a conscientious objector and the military turned them away. I managed to enlist in the U. S. Coast Guard. At the time, I had my reasons which is a story for another Nugget. Still, the Coast Guard was quite active in Vietnam; that too is for another Nugget but I did not serve in Vietnam. You can watch David Straight at:
https://rumble.com/vzpwip-david-straight-utah-seminar-part-2-of-5-discern-for-yourselves.html
People joined or did not object to being drafted for many reasons. When a young man or woman puts on the uniform of their country for the first time, there is sudden overwhelming feeling of immense pride that builds up from within; it certainly did in me. You are representing your country. You may actually have to go to battle for your country. Your country needs you. You are a lean mean fighting machine! If YOUR country orders YOU into battle, it is because the country is under attack and you want to preserve the freedoms and peace of every American in the country. You are nervous but you are still proud that you have been selected for this dangerous but NEEDED task that lies before you.
Why do I bring up Vietnam? So glad you asked. Most people growing up in the 50s and 60s were taught the tenants of the Ten Commandants at home, in the church, AND IN THE SCHOOLS! For example, we were taught not to kill. Not to steal. We were taught the Ten Commandants and for the record, it is difficult to disagree with those commandants. Still, in 2022, it is as if they have never existed. Now imagine that YOU have been drafted or YOU enlisted in one of the branches of the military and YOU are being shipped off to fight in Vietnam. Keep in mind that your parents and church, if you attended, taught you not to kill. But now you are a lean mean fighting machine and your job is to kill the enemy before the enemy kills you.
Here’s the problem. (1) don’t kill. (2) people WILL defend what THEY consider to be their homeland. (3) YOU are a foreigner on another person’s homeland, a foreigner with a big gun no less. (4) Thou shalt not kill! (5) Thou shalt not kill. (6) Thou shalt not kill. Suddenly you find yourself in a mental dilemma – do I fight and kill or do I do something else? In almost all cases, people followed the orders to fight and kill and became very good at it out of pure self-defense. They (YOU) were under contract. There was no way out. You were in a corner! You either did what you were told, obey a lawful order, or you get punished and maybe even thrown in the military brig (prison) and then given a less than honorable discharge. Just as important, you let your fellow soldiers/sailors down by not doing your job, doing what you were trained to do. There is a very real mental battle ongoing that few people can understand and that would include YOU, ESPECIALLY YOU!
Then YOU return stateside. Your gun is taken away from you. You are expected to return to a civilian life as if nothing had happened that changed your life forever. How does one do that? YOU have just been in a war and I don’t mean Vietnam. You have been in a war with your own brain. It is as if your brain has two sides talking to you at the same time. Kill vs. Don’t Kill! Over and over until one becomes dominant – kill. Now you are home and unknown to your spouse, parents, children, and friends, there is a raging war still ongoing in your head. On one side there is the enemy, who if the war had been fought for a real-life legal purpose, you would be defending the United States from that enemy. This side of your brain would be one of the good guys IF it were a NO ALTERNATIVE issue like defending American shores from an invasion. If you are like me, you KNEW that the United States, our government was NOT one of the good guys in the Vietnam War. You were being directed under orders to fight and kill someone that was absolutely no threat to the shores of the United States of America. You knew it. Your supervisors knew it. Everyone knew it, yet here YOU were, fighting and dying in a foreign land for unknown reasons. If you survived the war (over 50,000 didn’t), the mental war was NOT yet over!
The HUGE question becomes, how do YOU turn off the mental BAD WARRIOR instructing you to kill bad people and instead, listen to the PEACEFUL WARRIOR telling you, thou shalt not kill. I do not pretend to think I am a doctor nor did I stay at a Holiday Inn Express but I did listen to the class conducted by David Straight. Straight said that if YOU want to win the mental ongoing battle in your head, YOU have to FIRST recognize that the past is the past and you have to FORGIVE YOURSELF for whatever you did that was contrary to your deep routed beliefs. Straight said that he has seen veterans almost instantly cure themselves of PTSD when they recognize and identify the internal ongoing battle in their mind and then instantly learn to forgive themselves for what they may have done IN THE PAST that had been contrary to their parental teachings!
In more simple terms, you become at peace with God and in turn you become at peace with yourself. God or a Divine Spirit knows we all make mistakes, large and small, and can forgive us for our mistakes as long as we learn to forgive ourselves FIRST!
I don’t know if David
Straight is right or wrong, I only know that when I heard him make that
statement, the bells went off in my head.
I am eternally thankful that I never had to go to Vietnam. I was one of the ones that if I had been
drafted, I would have been a very reluctant soldier because even at 18, I
KNEW THE WAR WAS A BUNCH OF BS! Over
50,000 Americans died in Vietnam and whole lot more were wounded both
physically and mentally for absolutely NO REASON that can be clearly defined. In 2022 it appears that the only reason we
fight most wars is so that people who make the implements of war can make more
money when there is an ongoing war. From
all indications, we are headed for World War III unless someone steps on the
brakes. If so, we are destined to repeat
this vicious cycle.
No comments:
Post a Comment